So if you woke up to -10 degrees this morning in Sheboygan and said to yourself, ‘I wish an asteroid would just hit us and end this whole thing,’ great news!
Apparently NASA’s Jet Propulsion Laboratory has identified an asteroid named 2024 YR4* and it now has a 2.6% of hitting Earth on December 22nd, 2032 (Merry Christmas!). That’s up from a 2.3% chance as of last week and a 1.6% chance in January.
Here’s my question: What is the threshold before we’re sending Bruce Willis and the boys up there to detonate this thing? I realize that ultimately 2.6% isn’t a high probability, but I assume that NASA has an ‘OH SH–‘ standard where we feel compelled to take action. Is that threshold 5%? 25%? 50%? Feels like once we’re getting into the coin flip stage of a nuclear winter we probably need to come up with some kind of a plan. And one that has an absolutely kick-ass soundtrack.
I’ll tell you one thing for certain: My personal, ‘cash out your Roth IRA and let it ride on the Packers to win the Super Bowl’ threshold is 10%. If 2024 YR4 hits the 10% mark I’m cashing out all tickets and making some bad financial decisions. Feels like my Doge Coin won’t be worth much if an entire continent gets wiped out.
*We need to work on more creative names for asteroids. ‘2024 YR4’ doesn’t really roll off of the tongue. There are cities all over America that hold naming-competitions for their snow plows, I think that would be an effective strategy here as well. Off of the top of my head: “Welcome to the Rock,” “Jabberrocky,” “Rockness Monster,” “These Aren’t the Roids You’re Looking For,” “Destroid,” “Asteroid McAsteroidFace.” Was that so hard?
PS: We talk often on the B93 Morning Show about, ‘good, crappy movies.’ Movies that hold almost no critical-acclaim, the dialog is cheesy and the plot holes are many, but it’s still a movie you watch anytime it’s one. Michael Bay is the Scorsese of this genre. And Armageddon is one of the all time great, crappy movies.
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